Gambling Funny Story

If you follow the gambling headlines, pseudo celeb tattler pages or any form of social media you've probably heard the name Dan Bilzerian. This soon-to-be 34 year old trust fund baby has made quite the name for himself as a globe-trotting playboy/actor/internet sensation who lives a life filled with excess ‐ from gambling in Las Vegas Casinos, private jets, guns, fast cars, and hot parties to even hotter, almost always naked women. A lifestyle which 6.5 million plus fans on Facebook and 5.43 million followers on Instagram seem to aspire to ‐ even if they have to live it vicariously through Dan who never seems to tire of sharing his lavish adventures online.

In spite of being handed everything on a silver platter in life, Bilzerian has actually made a name for himself as a professional gambler. In 2009 he played in the World Series of Poker (WSOP) main event and was featured in six episodes of the show's television broadcast. He finished in 180th place and earned $36,626 which was merely a drop in the pond for him, considering his formidable family fortune.

According to various reports his gambling wins from one tournament alone amount to $10.8 million but it is uncertain how much of his approximate $100 million net worth is owed to gambling wins. One thing is for sure though, he's not afraid to take risks and play big, even if that means losing big ‐ or at least what some would consider big. One such example is a recent $1 million loss at the tables which he blamed on the "view" in a Facebook post ‐ that view being of a scantily clad member of the opposite sex.

While Dan may live in Los Angeles, he spends a great deal of time in Las Vegas ‐ a city of excess that seems to be the perfect fit for the millionaire playboy who never seems to tire of gambling and partying. And he's become somewhat of a fixture on the who's who of the city, recently hosting an insane asylum themed Halloween party at Marquee Las Vegas where he judged his own lookalike contest, awarding the winner with a $10k cash prize.

It seems like the sky is the limit and anything is possible when it comes to Dan Bilzerian. In fact, at the time of writing this he is fuelling his private jet and heading back to the fabulous city of Las Vegas for another blow out week-end...we can't wait to see what happens next.

Casino Poetry: Memories

In the booming bonny breeze 

I sit silent staring 

As the tides of time tickle 

Swollen solemn soul 

Yearning and yelling 

Beyond the bright blue skies 

Mummy miming memories 

Our past parting pranks 

Daddy dashing darts 

At the mean men's casino 

Night women daring darlings 

Weak men pouring honey 

I sit silent staring Blankly, beyond beautiful sky 

Memories of mummy and daddy Still liveth

How to behave at casino place?

First and foremost, it’s important to note that casinos are open to adults only i.e. individuals aged 18 years and above (sometimes 21 years and above) so you shouldn't attempt to get into a casino with a child especially if you want to gamble.

Also, before entering, you should park your car in designated parking zones or use valet parking service to avoid inconveniencing other casino-goers.

You should expect to be frisked before entry. You are expected to cooperate fully when this is being done given the fact that casinos are high-risk establishments that need to have tight security. It’s also important to note that most casinos don’t allow people to enter and use most electronic gadgets within the casino.

Most casinos allow smoking so don’t be shocked when you see people smoking cigars or cigarettes freely. There are however designated non-smoking zones you can visit if you don’t smoke or mind smoke. Nevertheless, it is good etiquette to avoid blowing smoke if you are a smoker even when smoking in designated smoking zones.

In regards to the actual gaming experience, you are expected to give fellow players the opportunity to enjoy gaming without disturbing or distracting them in any way. Drunk and disorderly behavior i.e. shouting and getting into physical altercations is strictly forbidden.

When handling cards or chips, you need to do so in the full glare of cameras. It is also important to avoid counting cash openly. You should handle your chips with caution as well. When gambling, you shouldn’t touch your chips after making a bet when the game is in progress.

When joining games, you are required to look at placards highlighting the required minimums as well as maximums to join instead of asking what the minimums and maximums are which causes distractions.

In regards to giving signals, you should give both a verbal and a clear hand signal when playing games like blackjack to avoid disputes.

In regards to tipping, most casinos allow it on an open policy i.e. it should be done in the full glare of cameras especially when tipping dealers. Tips should be placed on the table and not handed to dealers directly.

You can tip a dealer whatever amount you want however, it is good etiquette to tip 1 to 5% of your total winnings. Waitresses among other casino staff i.e. valet parking staff can be tipped $1 to $5 dollar tips or more. Unlike dealers, they can handle tips directly.

Casino Quote

Gambling Humor: Story of Gambler

(I am a slot technician at a casino, and a patron is having trouble cashing out of a slot machine. This is back when the only way to cash out was to get coins, and many patrons still used coins to play rather than bills. There is a button you push on the front of the machine to cash out, but it isn’t working.)

Me: “Hello, sir, what seems to be the problem?”

Patron: “Your machine is broken! I just want my d*** money but it won’t cash me out.”

(I ask him to hit the cashout button for me. We’re not allowed to hit any buttons while a patron has money in the machine. He does and it doesn’t work.)

Patron: “See?!”

(He mashes the button repeatedly in anger.)

Patron: “I want my d*** money!”

(At this point I look at the state of the machine and realize that it’s in the middle of a bet… He has already bet a credit and the machine is just waiting to spin. There is no way to get the money out until the spin is done. I begin to explain this to him.)

Patron: “That’s bull-s***! I DID NOT bet a credit. Why the hell would I do that when I want to go home!”

Me: “I don’t know, sir, but the machine does have a credit bet. If you could just hit the spin button…”

Patron: *yelling* “I did not bet a credit! I’m not going to spend any more of my money in your machine! You’re just trying to get more money out of me!”

Me: “Sir, if there are no credits bet, hitting spin won’t do anything. If you’re correct, nothing will happen. If I’m right, the machine will spin and you’ll be able to cash out.”

Patron: “I’m telling you that I did not bet a credit!”

Me: “Perhaps your hand slipped when you were hitting the cash out button, sir, and you accidently…”

Patron: *furious now* “Son, I’m a surgeon. My hands don’t slip. I take people’s lives in my hands every single day, and if my hands were prone to slipping those people could be dead! I want you to cash me out, NOW!”

(At this point the man’s wife, who had been sitting down next to us in silence the entire time, reached over and quietly hit the ‘spin’ button. As I expected, the machine bean to spin the reels. They landed on a small to credit win and the cash out button lit up. He lowered his gaze and slowly hit the cash out button. Of course, the coins began to drop in the tray. I flashed a small smile to the wife, who subtly rolled her eyes and looked apologetic. The surgeon, defeated, took his coins and slowly walked away without a word.)

What future is waiting for online casinos?

The gambling industry that exists online, while over 15 years old, is still in its infancy states. It has come far since inception and continues to experience rapid growth across the various markets it caters to. The newest of those is mobile gaming as well as live casino gaming.

The industry has seen some big changes in recent years. The start of this came about as a result of the Unlawful Internet Gambling Enforcement Act, which was passed into law in the U.S in 2006. It was the result of American greed and the purported protection of citizens however was more in relation to protecting land based casino operations. However, the repercussions were almost instant and saw the American market closed but more so, it began a trend of other countries enacting laws towards licensing and taxation.

While that had an impact, it failed to sour the growth of gambling online or the spirits of those who support it. Here is a little insight into what the future holds for this lucrative and exciting industry.

The games and software themselves are an integral aspect of casino gaming. The majority of people base their choices on the games seen when previewing a casino and there is little doubt this will change. The game choices available now will not change but new game development is high on the agenda of software developers, who strive constantly to create new unique games with new features that will propel them to a higher level in popularity, which in effect increases revenue.

As technology advances you can expect to games with an increase in player interaction. There are a few software companies that are more focused in this genre while others are more focused towards increasing game libraries based on the number of games they offer. Often the case is that people select games based on themes and features, therefore having a broader selection means it appeals to a broader range of likes/dislikes. An example of this is Microgaming, who have over 800 games at their disposal.

The future of graphics and game animations will only intensify and continue to be developed. It is a driving force within new game creation as people crave the interaction of those games that allow for more than just another slot but one that is more on an entertainment experience. One area that will be extended is that of 3D animation that will allow for cartoon like game animations and ones with increased options in respect to how a game is viewed or played.

What is like to hit the jackpot?

Linked jackpots have not kept pace with inflation or competition, but there are signs of invigoration in the sector. Nothing makes a trip to the local club more exciting than the thrill of winnin a jackpot on the pokies. Winning jackpots have long been an important part of hte appeal of playing online slots. Most people won't hesitate to drop a few spare coins into a poker machine for the chance to win a jackpot of a couple of thousands dollars or more. Australia has seen unprecedented growth in progressive jackpots over the past few years.So what is hot nowadays and where could jackpots be going to head in the future?
The easy binary fission between achievable and aspirational helps explain the appeal of different jackpot games. Achievable jackpots are those that gamblers truly believe they have a great opportunity for having a chance of winning. The value of these jackpots might not necessarily be the stuff that dreams are made of, but what they lack in dollar terms is made up for in the frequency of reward. Knowing that there is a good chance of actually winning the jackpot is key to the appeal of these games.

In contrast, aspirational jackpots are large in dollar terms but the chances of an individual player winning one are low. For instance, the odds of winning division one prize in Powerball are 1 in 77million. To put that in perspective, a person who buys a 12-game quick pick every week can expect to win the jackpot once every 123,025 years. Clearly people do not buy Powerball tickets with a rational expectation of winning; they buy a ticket because they aspire to the potential new lifestyle that winning such a jackpot promises. The tagline for the recent Powerball advertisements - the power to change it all- is an accurate reflection on the appeal to these products to others.
Recent growth of jackpots has mostly been driven by an explosion in the popularity of stand-alone progressive games, called SAP. They are now the dominant style of the game on the Australian market. Unlike linked jackpots games,where multiple machines all contributed to and have a chance of winning the same jackpot pool, in SAP game the jackpot is restricted to an individual machine. The SAP games fall into the achiavable jackpots category - a regular SAP machine player has a very high likelihood of winning the jackpot.
The maximum prize value allowed for a linked jackpot has not changed in more than two decades. The current $100000 prize limit can hardly be considered an aspirational life-changing prize. For most people a life changing jackpot is one that is at least large enough to pay off the mortgage on the family home.
Gambling industry continues to develop casino games with great jackpot winnings and the right product is going to create win-win situation for fans of gambling.